Crystal’s Story
“I would like my life to be a statement of love and compassion - and where it isn't, that's where my work lies.”
- Baba Ram Dass
Hi there!
My name is Crystal. I’m a professionally-trained Esoteric astrologer, mentor, writer, and teacher on a lifelong quest to learn and explore what we humans need, in order to ride the waves of life with an open mind and an open heart.
I am fascinated by knowledge: both what is known and measurable with the rational mind (i.e., the outer world, science), and what is unknown and unexplainable with the rational mind (i.e., the inner world, spirituality). I believe we need both, in order to find balance in our human experience.
My relationship with death and loss is my biggest motivator for doing this work. The journey began when I was a kid and I experienced continual loss from ages 11 – 25. It took several years before I could begin to comprehend the weight of the loss I had experienced, and the impact it would have on me. However, I always knew deep down these experiences were karmic in a way, without having any knowledge, or framework, to help me make sense of it all. I just knew all of it was supposed to happen and unfold the way it did, even if I didn’t understand it, or find it fair.
Growing up, I was raised with a semi-religious outlook because of how my parents were brought up. Even so, we didn’t actively attend church, or go to many weekly church events. So, I never had a built-in belief system, or worldview, to fall back on to help me move through these hardships. Instead, I did what most people do – detach, disconnect, distract. Even if I wasn’t conscious of it at the time, looking back, I did a lot of avoiding, numbing, and escaping as a way to survive the amount of pain my heart struggled to process. So, I sought shelter in the safety of my rational mind, and began to strip the meaning out of anything meaningful, chalking it up to a meaningless coincidence. This approach made for a safe, yet lackluster existence.
Eventually, my relationship with my rational mind began to shift when I became a guardian and caregiver for my grandmother (the last living relative on my paternal side). I quickly realized I was the only one left to carry on the legacy of my father's side of my family tree. I needed something beyond myself to help me understand this new role.
At the time, I turned to yoga, which led me down a philosophical journey. It wasn't long before I had stumbled upon a man named Baba Ram Dass and devoured his teachings on life, death, and everything in between.
THESE RESOURCES GAVE ME TWO THINGS:
An expanded worldview beyond what is taught in the western world.
2. A deeper sense of connection with my Self that started the process of healing.
Although I had started the process of healing all of the grief I had been carrying, it still wasn’t enough to keep me from spiraling deeper into a pit of internal chaos. I’m sure you know the story – we experience a hard thing and do some initial grieving, then life happens - we move on and get busy. We get tired of dealing with the discomfort and pain of healing our hearts, so we put off this necessary step, until it reminds us that it’s still waiting for our attention.
Fast forward many months and details…I found myself sitting at rock bottom - falling apart mentally and emotionally. I still could not grasp the meaning, or complexity, of my situation and life experiences. I felt alone.
This is when I surrendered and decided to sit in the depths of that darkness, accepting exactly where I was. Once I embraced my situation, it was just a matter of asking myself, “What am I missing? What am I not seeing? What it is the point? What do I need to see more clearly?”
vs. What is this trying to teach me?”
“Why is this happening to me?
Once I began asking these kinds of questions, things began to change. Not rapidly and suddenly, but slowly and steadily. I diligently followed the breadcrumbs of my curiosity that eventually led me to Astrology. This was a pivotal moment for me - when for the first time in my life I truly discovered who I was. I was able to find context for my pain and suffering. I was able to open up to life and trust again. It became glaringly obvious that, if I didn’t want to backtrack, things needed to drastically change. So began my path of healing, self-discovery, and personal development.
As I deepened into my experiences on this new path, I saw that there is more to the world than what the rational mind can see. How silly it is of us humans to act like we have it all figured out, when there is so much we’ve yet to discover in this world. I realized how important it was to create a worldview that leaves room for the unknowns (as much as the knowns). This philosophy allows us to loosen our grip on life, so that we can let go of what we cannot control.
From then on, I spent every moment I could reading, learning, and listening to as many resources I could get my hands on – from astrology, to psychology, to neurobiology, to spirituality, etc. Now that I had developed an increased awareness and expanded worldview that helped me connect to life from a space of detached compassion (still a work in progress for me), I needed a framework to apply this knowledge into my everyday life. This is where I began weaving together the various tools and resources I had uncovered along my journey.
I know I will stumble, as I learn to walk the tightrope between the mind and the heart, but I am committed to learning, growing, and flowing as much as necessary, all while holding myself accountable and giving myself the grace to mess up and try again.
Insightfully Crystal was born because I believe it is my life’s work to share the resources I’ve gathered along the way, and guide others on their own journey of self-discovery, personal development, and healing.
My goal is to help others face the unknown, lean into their curiosities, overcome the fears and obstacles of life, and learn to trust in their Self. Through my work, I hope to offer a sense of neutrality and nonjudgment to the practice of healing the mind and the heart.
What started out as an internal cry for help and a curious mind has turned into a business where I get to share my toolbox and help others on their own evolutionary path. My dream is to pass on the lessons that helped me loosen my grip and ride the waves of life with a little more grace, compassion, and courage.
